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You know how hard it is to find a TRULY unique gift. Well, now you've found one. Representing some of the finest, most outrageous entertainment you'll ever find for pocket change. You'll receive ten (10) copies (3 copies when ordering full page format, or 2 copies of the "whole newspaper" selection). You do NOT have to supply your photo (same price either way). The backs of each article are covered in generic, unrelated text to complete the look and feel of absolute authenticity. "Pocket clippings" are printed on 36 x 36 inch pallet sheets of newsprint, then torn from the sheet to look as though they're torn from a real newspaper---which they are! Other formats are printed life-size on individual sheets. Our articles will fool virtually anyone. You'll keep these for years in scrapbooks and picture albums, you'll send them to relatives, friends, co-workers, ex-friends and victims, and you'll never again have so much fun for lunch money!
Fake/Joke Newspaper Article C-29
Street Urchins; Gals of Color
Speaking of off color....
Isn't it about time that guy found out what his girlfriend used to do for a living?
(For entertainment purposes only. Discretion is advised!)
Fake/Joke Newspaper Article Text -- Copyright © 2007 TrixiePixGraphicsStreetwalkers Ply Their Trade in Ponder's Corner Area
Street Prostitution "Out of Control" Says Mayor
Vice to Initiate Major Crackdown
Yourtown---- (NOTICE: Any names of towns, locations, people, institutions, etc., used in these sample fake newspaper stories, are purely fictional, chosen at random, and are not meant to portray or represent any real person, place or deed. Remember that no matter what name a writer chooses to use in any fictional story, there is a real person (or many persons) SOMEWHERE who have that exact name.)
Tacoma Vice Detectives announced Thursday that street prostitution in the Ponder's Corner area near Lakewood has become a major concern, which "merits major action".
"We're seeing a 60% increase in street prostitution," said Paul Williams, spokesman for Tacoma PD. "The vast majority of crime that's associated with prostitution stems from the street level, as opposed to organized brothels."
Police arrested 27 women Saturday night alone, for prostitution related charges. Among them was a young girl named Casey Jones.
"Look, I'm just trying to make some friends out here," said Jones. "So what if they give me money? I'm not doing anything wrong. I like lots of people---lots of guys. There's no law against that. Guys like me too. Why can't they (the police) just leave us alone. This is all bull****."
"This girl is a hard case," said Detective Morain. "We've seen her come through the system several times. It won't be long before she graduates from simple prostitution to assaults and robberies. There just aren't enough counseling resources to help steer these girls straight before they end up like Casey here."
The Mayor's office says it simply has no alternative but to crack down, and crack down hard.
See "Young Morals" Page D-5
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Whole Size $39.95, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 2 copies
Whole Size $87.50, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 5 copies
Whole Size $199.00, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 12 copies
Whole Size $600.00, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 50 copies
Small Pocket Clippings $17.95, No headline, 6x9 inches, 10 copies
Small Pocket Clippings $62.90, No headline, 6x9 inches, 30 copies
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Poster Size $49.95, With Headline, 42x75 inches, 1 copy
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Tabloid Size $24.95, With Headline, 13x21 inches, 3 copiesFor "Bulk" Advertising Fake News Clips, Go Here
Remember!
-----Whole Size is a two-sheet, eight-page WHOLE newspaper WITH HEADLINE
Poster Size is HUGE, printed on stiffer poster stock; one page WITH HEADLINE
Small Size is SMALL -- roughly a 6 x 9 inch "Pocket Clipping" with NO HEADLINE
Tabloid is tabloid sized, smaller than the Enquirer; one sheet, two pages each WITH HEADLINE
Full size is one full page, NOT one full SHEET; it's an INSIDE half-sheet page with NO HEADLINE
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