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You know how hard it is to find a TRULY unique gift. Well, now you've found one. Representing some of the finest, most outrageous entertainment you'll ever find for pocket change. You'll receive ten (10) copies (3 copies when ordering full page format, or 2 copies of the "whole newspaper" selection). You do NOT have to supply your photo (same price either way). The backs of each article are covered in generic, unrelated text to complete the look and feel of absolute authenticity. "Pocket clippings" are printed on 36 x 36 inch pallet sheets of newsprint, then torn from the sheet to look as though they're torn from a real newspaper---which they are! Other formats are printed life-size on individual sheets. Our articles will fool virtually anyone. You'll keep these for years in scrapbooks and picture albums, you'll send them to relatives, friends, co-workers, ex-friends and victims, and you'll never again have so much fun for lunch money!
Fake/Joke Newspaper Article C-17
Got a Pilot Friend? This Bud's for You.
No pilot would order this piece for themselves. You have to do it for 'em. Then pin it on the bulletin board at the local flight center. In this particular case, "results".....are GUARANTEED !!
(Just be careful what you wish for!)
Fake/Joke Newspaper Article Text -- Copyright © 2007 TrixiePixGraphicsLight Planes Hangs in Wires
Private Plane Crashes Near Industrial Area
Pilot Feels Lucky to be Alive
Yourtown---- (NOTICE: Any names of towns, locations, people, institutions, etc., used in these sample fake newspaper stories, are purely fictional, chosen at random, and are not meant to portray or represent any real person, place or deed. Remember that no matter what name a writer chooses to use in any fictional story, there is a real person (or many persons) SOMEWHERE who have that exact name.)
Pilot Casey Jones says he feels lucky to be alive after an incident which left 30,000 without power for twelve hours yesterday.
"I was flying with my wife at about 4000 feet over the edge of town. We were sort of, you know, making out," Jones admitted a little sheepishly. "We've done it before. It was no big deal. But, well, I don't know---something just went wrong. Next thing I knew, the plane had stalled. I tried to recover, but a part of my wife's clothing got hooked on the yoke, and I couldn't push it forward."
That kept the plane in a stall for about 3700 feet. With only 300 feet to spare, Mr. Jones was able to start recovering from the stall, but he still couldn't miss the wires.
"Sure it was scary," said the pilot. "We figured we'd bought the farm. If it hadn't been for the wires, we probably would have hit one of the buildings."
The FAA is investigating, and will decide later whether or not to cite the private pilot.
"We see quite a few of these," said John Kenny, FAA inspector. "I investigate maybe 20 cases a year."
The plane was extracted from the power lines by crane later in the day.
There were no reported injuries.
See 'Mile-High Club' Page D-5
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pay for and receive additional newspapers.To create your own story from scratch,
using your own main image, please
click HERE instead of using this form.Volume Discounts are available during checkout
Whole Size $39.95, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 2 identical copies
Whole Size $87.50, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 5 identical copies
Whole Size $199.00, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 12 identical copies
Whole Size $600.00, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 50 identical copies
Small Pocket Clippings $17.95, No headline, 6x9 inches, identical 10 copies
Small Pocket Clippings $45.00, No headline, 6x9 inches, 30 identical copies
Full Page $24.95, (half sheet), No Headline, 13x23 inches, 4 identical copies
Full Page $67.85, (half sheet), No Headline, 13x23 inches, 8 identical copies
Full Page $146.95, (half sheet), No Headline, 13x23 inches, 21 identical copies
Poster Size $49.95, With Headline, 42x75 inches, 1 copy
Poster Size $217.95, With Headline, 42x75 inches, 5 identical copies
Tabloid Size $29.95, With Headline, 13x21 inches, 4 identical copiesFor "Bulk" Advertising Fake News Clips, Go Here
Or....choose from three OTHER options:
Write your own personalized newspapers from scratch (from $17.95)
Write your own story in your own words and upload any pictures you like (or none at all).
Upload your own complete newspaper page layout (from $39.95)
Create your own complete newspaper page using the page-layout software of your
choice, then upload that page to us and we'll modify it to print as a newspaper.Choose a pre-written bulk newspaper (cannot be modified) (from $4.95)
Many fake newspaper stories/articles are available as a pre-written selection which
cannot be modified to suit. More are added almost daily. We have a HUGE backlog
of archived and unfinished stories (many hundreds).
Remember!
-----Whole Size is a two-sheet, eight-page WHOLE newspaper WITH HEADLINE
Poster Size is HUGE, printed on stiffer poster stock; one page WITH HEADLINE
Small Size is SMALL -- roughly a 6 x 9 inch "Pocket Clipping" with NO HEADLINE
Tabloid is tabloid sized, smaller than the Enquirer; one sheet, two pages each WITH HEADLINE
Full size is one full page, NOT one full SHEET; it's an INSIDE half-sheet page with NO HEADLINE
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