Ask a Question    TrixiePixieGraphics.com™    FakeNewspapers.com™    Channel54News.com    
Gag Gifts & Art, More Fun than a Halter-Top Full of Ferrets

FakeNewspapers & Gags

Giant Checks - Fake Pregnancy Tests - Fake DNA/Paternity Tests - Fake Newspapers - FBI Wanted Posters
Fake Certificates - Custom Gift Wrapping Paper - Huge Banners - Old West Wanted Posters - Crossword Puzzles
Book Binding - Personalized Books - Fake Obituaries - Fake Prescriptions - Fake Ultrasounds
- KubeKompanion

TrixiePixieGraphics™   4.5 Stars Yahoo Customer Satisfaction Rating   Store Rating    About Shipping    View Cart/Checkout

This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed. TrixiePix™, Trixiepixie™, TrixiePixel™, FakeNewspapers™, AlienAnalProbe™, Channel54News™ are Trademarks of TrixiePixGraphics™. Copyright © 1982 - 2008 TrixiePixGraphics™. All Rights Reserved

You know how hard it is to find a TRULY unique gift. Well, now you've found one. Representing some of the finest, most outrageous entertainment you'll ever find for pocket change. You'll receive ten (10) copies (3 copies when ordering full page format, or 2 copies of the "whole newspaper" selection). You do NOT have to supply your photo (same price either way). The backs of each article are covered in generic, unrelated text to complete the look and feel of absolute authenticity. "Pocket clippings" are printed on 36 x 36 inch pallet sheets of newsprint, then torn from the sheet to look as though they're torn from a real newspaper---which they are! Other formats are printed life-size on individual sheets. Our articles will fool virtually anyone. You'll keep these for years in scrapbooks and picture albums, you'll send them to relatives, friends, co-workers, ex-friends and victims, and you'll never again have so much fun for lunch money!

As Seen on TV

Fake/Joke Newspaper Article C-133
Michael (Wacko) Jackson Not Guilty on All Counts
California Judicial Branch Disbanded

California Judicial System Disbanded After Michael Jackson Verdicts


Michael Jackson, OJ Simpson, what's next for CalyFORNia?

Fake/Joke Newspaper Article Text -- Copyright © 2007 TrixiePixGraphics


California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger vs. Wacko-Jacko

California Judicial System to be Disbanded

By Mike Peters
AP Reporter

Sacramento, CA.—

In a stunning announcement today, California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger said the California state judicial system was to be disbanded in its entirety.

Speaking of the Michael Jackson not-guilty verdicts on June 13, Schwarzenegger said, "Hey. If these people (the Michael Jackson jury and population of California) want chaos and anarchy, let 'em have it! If these people won't put the murderers and pedophiles away, and get them off the streets and out of society, then so be it. The population of this state can live with these people in their midst, with no repercussions whatsoever for any crimes these criminals might care to inflict on them, including pedophilia, murder, drug dealing, rape, to name but a few. Why should we continue to collect taxes to finance and employ tens of thousands of dedicated, hard-working law enforcement and judicial employees whose only purpose in life is to protect those very citizens who thumb their noses at that protection! If the people of California want criminals to have carte blanche to commit whatever atrocities they desire, then let's help the people of California get what they want.....and what they deserve!"

Schwarzenegger announced that, effective immediately, all law enforcement and judicial employees would be released from their duties and may then go home.

"This 'Girlie Man' population [of California] has shown over and over and over, in the OJ Simpson trial, in the Michael Jackson trial, and in countless thousands of other criminal proceedings, that it has made a conscious decision to protect its criminals and to allow them to roam free," lamented the Governor. "My job is to give the people what they want."

The resultant outcry against Schwarzeneggers statement was loud and long and fierce--but it was dwarfed by the applause of those in agreement.

Hundreds of thousands of demonstrators marched through the streets of most major California cities today in support of the Michael Jackson verdicts, chanting, "Love is never a sin", and "Let chaos reign". Banners and signs read, "Let Michael Love", and "Michael can have MY son".

The rest of the nation was stunned by the verdicts, and by Schwarzenegger's decision to disband the judicial and law enforcement structures of the state.
Prosecutors across the country openly speculated whether California's water system had been tainted with some sort of drug causing mass-psychosis; some have actually asked the EPA to begin testing.

"We've always known California was whacked," admitted President Bush, shaking his head. "Heck, that's no secret. But even cutting those folks about a hundred miles of slack, the [Michael] Jackson verdicts are still eye-poppers. What's next?"

"Those jurors dissected the trees with fine precision and high-powered optics," said Schwarzenegger. "Too bad they were so busy looking at the trees that they never saw the forest."

Schwarzenegger said he plans to call for the renaming of California to Neverland.

A spokesman for Michael Jackson said, "If the Gov don't rename it, we will!"

See "Stupid is as Stupid Does" --or-- "Sodom and Gomorrah"
Page A-11

View NEXT Fake Newspaper 

 

Write Your Own Fake Newspapers From Scratch
Questions about Fake Newspapers? Try Our FAQs First!
View Optional Format Samples
Email

Instructions:

Personalize and SUBMIT the form.
Then click "CONTINUE" to go to the payment page.
Follow the flow through the Shopping Cart check-out.
To make corrections please submit a new form.
Once
your new form has been submitted, you're done. DO NOT
go through the payment process again unless to wish to
pay for and receive additional newspapers.

To create your own story from scratch,
using your own main image, please
click HERE instead of using this form.

Volume Discounts are available during checkout

Whole Size $39.95, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 2 copies
Whole Size $87.50, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 5 copies
Whole Size $199.00, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 12 copies
Whole Size $600.00, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 50 copies
Small Pocket Clippings $17.95, No headline, 6x9 inches, 10 copies
Small Pocket Clippings $62.90, No headline, 6x9 inches, 30 copies
Full Page $24.95, (half sheet), No Headline, 13x23 inches, 3 copies
Full Page $67.85, (half sheet), No Headline, 13x23 inches, 9 copies
Full Page $146.95, (half sheet), No Headline, 13x23 inches, 21 copies
Poster Size $49.95, With Headline, 42x75 inches, 1 copy
Poster Size $217.95, With Headline, 42x75 inches, 5 copies
Tabloid Size $24.95, With Headline, 13x21 inches, 3 copies

For "Bulk" Advertising Fake News Clips, Go Here


Remember!

-----

Whole Size is a two-sheet, eight-page WHOLE newspaper WITH HEADLINE
Poster Size is HUGE, printed on stiffer poster stock; one page WITH HEADLINE
Small Size is SMALL -- roughly a 6 x 9 inch "Pocket Clipping" with NO HEADLINE
Tabloid is tabloid sized, smaller than the Enquirer; one sheet, two pages each WITH HEADLINE
Full size is one full page, NOT one full SHEET; it's an INSIDE half-sheet page with NO HEADLINE


Fake Newspaper Personalization Form Fill out the following information and click 'Submit'.

Delete any unwanted text in any field
Type NONE in any fields you want left blank
*Article Number   
*Your First Name
25 characters remaining.  
*Your Last Name
25 characters remaining.  
*Email: 
*Verify Email: 
*Date of Newspaper
This prints!

30 characters remaining.  
*Newspaper Name
This prints!

35 characters remaining.  
*Newspaper Headline
(whole & poster ONLY!)

60 characters remaining.  
*Image Description
150 characters remaining.  
*Article Headline
80 characters remaining.  
*Byline
20 characters remaining.  
*Story Location
20 characters remaining.  
*Main Story Text
2100 chars for small size
4500 chars for other sizes

4500 characters remaining.  
*I agree to check my
email in case there
are questions about
my order  
YES
Freeway Sign Text
(Complete this field
for C-112 ONLY!)

40 characters remaining.  
Trophy Text
(Complete this
field for C-16
or C-32 ONLY!)

20 characters remaining.  
Valentine Message
(Complete this field
for C-58 ONLY!)

140 characters remaining.  
Main Image Upload
(if any)
 
Inset Image Upload
(if any)
 
*Have You Included Any
Images (above)?  
YES
NO
*Size & Format for this Story?   
*I understand I may NEVER
email with corrections,
changes, or updates to my
story. I agree to SUBMIT A
NEW FORM for corrections  
YES
*I Agree Not to Use This
Product for Illegal
and/or Fraudulent
Purposes  
YES

We accept: American Express, Master Card, Visa, Discover

Copyright © 1982-2008 TrixiePixGraphics.Com, All Rights Reserved

View Size and Format Options Here