Ask a Question    TrixiePixieGraphics.com™    FakeNewspapers.com™    Channel54News.com    
Gag Gifts & Art, More Fun than a Halter-Top Full of Ferrets

FakeNewspapers & Gags

Giant Checks - Fake Pregnancy Tests - Fake DNA/Paternity Tests - Fake Newspapers - FBI Wanted Posters
Fake Certificates - Custom Gift Wrapping Paper - Huge Banners - Old West Wanted Posters - Crossword Puzzles
Book Binding - Personalized Books - Fake Obituaries - Fake Prescriptions - Fake Ultrasounds
- KubeKompanion

TrixiePixieGraphics™   4.5 Stars Yahoo Customer Satisfaction Rating   Store Rating    About Shipping    View Cart/Checkout

This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed. TrixiePix™, Trixiepixie™, TrixiePixel™, FakeNewspapers™, AlienAnalProbe™, Channel54News™ are Trademarks of TrixiePixGraphics™. Copyright © 1982 - 2008 TrixiePixGraphics™. All Rights Reserved

You know how hard it is to find a TRULY unique gift. Well, now you've found one. Representing some of the finest, most outrageous entertainment you'll ever find for pocket change. You'll receive ten (10) copies (3 copies when ordering full page format, or 2 copies of the "whole newspaper" selection). You do NOT have to supply your photo (same price either way). The backs of each article are covered in generic, unrelated text to complete the look and feel of absolute authenticity. "Pocket clippings" are printed on 36 x 36 inch pallet sheets of newsprint, then torn from the sheet to look as though they're torn from a real newspaper---which they are! Other formats are printed life-size on individual sheets. Our articles will fool virtually anyone. You'll keep these for years in scrapbooks and picture albums, you'll send them to relatives, friends, co-workers, ex-friends and victims, and you'll never again have so much fun for lunch money!

As Seen on TV

Fake/Joke Newspaper Article C-132
Laura Bush vs. Teresa Heinz Kerry
Celebrity Death-Match

This is one "Celebrity Death-Match" we'd like to see...

 
Fake/Joke Newspaper Article Text -- Copyright © 2007 TrixiePixGraphics


Aftermath of Brief Scuffle Between Laura and Teresa

Celebrity Death-Match -- When Good Girls Go Bad

By Mike Peters
AP Reporter

Philadelphia, PA—

It started with an off-color comment by Teresa Heinz Kerry on Tuesday to the effect that Laura Bush had never held a job. Ms. Kerry apologized immediately, saying she had “forgotten” about Laura Bush’s teaching career. But this incident seemed to have sparked a hotter flame in what’s been described as “a tension” between the two high-powered women.

“Teresa has a mouth,” quipped a Bush spokesperson. “It gets her into trouble.”
“Laura has been nothing but gracious despite jab after jab by [Teresa] Kerry. I don’t know how Laura retains her composure,” admitted one of Teresa’s own campaign executives.

But the rift grew wider when the two women crossed paths in Philadelphia today, and Teresa Heinz Kerry was heard to make several derogatory comments about Laura Bush.

“I was pretty shocked,” said a Secret Service employee who asked not to be identified. “The Kerry woman just doesn’t know when to quit.”

As the First lady’s entourage crossed paths with the Kerry group entering the banquet room of a posh downtown hotel, Teresa made a sudden move toward Laura which triggered a knee-jerk reaction by the Secret Service.

“We wouldn’t normally consider Teresa Heinz Kerry a threat,” comments one agent, “but any time there’s a sudden movement, all of our instincts go into high gear.”
While no one seems exactly sure of Teresa’s intent, several witnesses confirm that Teresa was making comments under her breath as she approached Mrs. Bush that were, according to some, “unfit for a lady”.

As Teresa came within arm’s reach of Laura, a Secret Service agent moved to intercede. There was a “brief contact” said a spokesman, in which the agent brushed aside one of Teresa’s arms. That’s went things went downhill.
“I’m really very sorry,” said the First lady. “I really didn’t mean to hurt [Teresa]. I was just afraid for Mr. Stipman.”

It seems Laura thought Teresa had slapped her personal body guard, and in a split second, before anyone could react, Laura Bush inflicted injuries to Ms. Kerry which were later diagnosed as “serious and substantial.”

Ms. Kerry was taken away by ambulance; Mrs. Bush removed a band-aid from her purse and applied it to her cheek, then continued with her duties at the banquet.
The Kerry team vows to sue.

————————-
See "Related Story" Page A-15

View NEXT Fake Newspaper 

 

Write Your Own Fake Newspapers From Scratch
Questions about Fake Newspapers? Try Our FAQs First!
View Optional Format Samples
Email

Instructions:

Personalize and SUBMIT the form.
Then click "CONTINUE" to go to the payment page.
Follow the flow through the Shopping Cart check-out.
To make corrections please submit a new form.
Once
your new form has been submitted, you're done. DO NOT
go through the payment process again unless to wish to
pay for and receive additional newspapers.

To create your own story from scratch,
using your own main image, please
click HERE instead of using this form.

Volume Discounts are available during checkout

Whole Size $39.95, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 2 copies
Whole Size $87.50, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 5 copies
Whole Size $199.00, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 12 copies
Whole Size $600.00, (Whole Newspaper With Headline), 23x27 inches, 50 copies
Small Pocket Clippings $17.95, No headline, 6x9 inches, 10 copies
Small Pocket Clippings $62.90, No headline, 6x9 inches, 30 copies
Full Page $24.95, (half sheet), No Headline, 13x23 inches, 3 copies
Full Page $67.85, (half sheet), No Headline, 13x23 inches, 9 copies
Full Page $146.95, (half sheet), No Headline, 13x23 inches, 21 copies
Poster Size $49.95, With Headline, 42x75 inches, 1 copy
Poster Size $217.95, With Headline, 42x75 inches, 5 copies
Tabloid Size $24.95, With Headline, 13x21 inches, 3 copies

For "Bulk" Advertising Fake News Clips, Go Here


Remember!

-----

Whole Size is a two-sheet, eight-page WHOLE newspaper WITH HEADLINE
Poster Size is HUGE, printed on stiffer poster stock; one page WITH HEADLINE
Small Size is SMALL -- roughly a 6 x 9 inch "Pocket Clipping" with NO HEADLINE
Tabloid is tabloid sized, smaller than the Enquirer; one sheet, two pages each WITH HEADLINE
Full size is one full page, NOT one full SHEET; it's an INSIDE half-sheet page with NO HEADLINE


Fake Newspaper Personalization Form Fill out the following information and click 'Submit'.

Delete any unwanted text in any field
Type NONE in any fields you want left blank
*Article Number   
*Your First Name
25 characters remaining.  
*Your Last Name
25 characters remaining.  
*Email: 
*Verify Email: 
*Date of Newspaper
This prints!

30 characters remaining.  
*Newspaper Name
This prints!

35 characters remaining.  
*Newspaper Headline
(whole & poster ONLY!)

60 characters remaining.  
*Image Description
150 characters remaining.  
*Article Headline
80 characters remaining.  
*Byline
20 characters remaining.  
*Story Location
20 characters remaining.  
*Main Story Text
2100 chars for small size
4500 chars for other sizes

4500 characters remaining.  
*I agree to check my
email in case there
are questions about
my order  
YES
Freeway Sign Text
(Complete this field
for C-112 ONLY!)

40 characters remaining.  
Trophy Text
(Complete this
field for C-16
or C-32 ONLY!)

20 characters remaining.  
Valentine Message
(Complete this field
for C-58 ONLY!)

140 characters remaining.  
Main Image Upload
(if any)
 
Inset Image Upload
(if any)
 
*Have You Included Any
Images (above)?  
YES
NO
*Size & Format for this Story?   
*I understand I may NEVER
email with corrections,
changes, or updates to my
story. I agree to SUBMIT A
NEW FORM for corrections  
YES
*I Agree Not to Use This
Product for Illegal
and/or Fraudulent
Purposes  
YES

We accept: American Express, Master Card, Visa, Discover

Copyright © 1982-2008 TrixiePixGraphics.Com, All Rights Reserved

View Size and Format Options Here