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Yes, it's again that magical time of the year when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us:

Here are the glorious winners:

1. When his 38 - caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach, California, would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.

2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting machine and submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.
 
3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space...understandably, he shot her.

4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayohad escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.

5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.

6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer: $15.  (If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed?)

7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape.

8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the purse-snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from."

9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Yipsilanti, Michigan , at 5 a.m, flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.

10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges, saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had.

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Fake Newspapers Presents: How to Fake a Pregnancy Papers, Fake Pregnancy Documents, ept pregnancy test, first response pregnancy test, negative pregnancy test, early pregnancy tests, positive pregnancy, pregnancy test results, free pregnancy test, blood pregnancy test, false negative pregnancy test, pregnancy test hcg, Santa Bellies, Santa Belly

Fake Ultrasounds
Fake Ultrasounds 3D
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Fake Pregnancy Tests
Fake Pregnancy Bellies
Fake Pregnancy Papers

Fake Preggo Everything

Be even scarier than THIS for Halloween
Now you too can be even scarier than THIS for Halloween!

Have Fun with
Fake Pregnancy Bellies

Be Pregnant -- Get More Presents!
(these make great Santa Bellies too!)

You're going somewhere on Turkey-Day and Christmas, Right?
Go Pregnant! You Know You Want to!

Item Number --- FPB
How to Fake a Pregnancy, Fake Pregnancy Bellies, Belly, Stomachs, Stomach,
Fat Suit, Pregnant Suit, Fake Pregnant Belly, Pregnant Garment, Pregnancy Sympathy Suit

Scare the Absolute B-Jesus Out of Your
Boyfriend / Professor / Cousin / Brother-in-Law
with Fake Pregnancy Stomachs!

Usually ships same day, always within 72 hours.


Fake Pregnancy Belly                   Fake Pregnancy Belly, Back

Fake Pregnant Bellies                   Fake Pregnancy Bellies

Colors and fabrics may vary -- All bellies cut from same patterns w/polyfil stuffing

Fake Pregnancy Belly Stomach Bellies
Shows the actual fake pregnancy garment being worn

Fake Pregnant Belly  Fake Pregnant Garment
Shows the actual fake pregnancy garment being worn

Make the belly larger or smaller by wearing
tighter or looser tube-tops underneath.
Look 3 months pregnant, or eight.

Fake Pregnancy Belly                         Fake Pregnant Belly in Bag
Some (depending on the supplier) ship in a plastic storage bag with a hanging hook thing that serves virtually no purpose at all
except to protect it from Badger feces, which may or may not be a significant problem in your home.
Bag types and styles, and colors and fabrics of bellies, may vary from that shown.

Notice: as of March, 2009, we are occasionally receiving bellies from the manufacturer without storage bags.

Note: If you hike these up on your body they
also make a great "Santa Suit Belly"

Fake pregnant belly
Pregnant costume
Pregnant belly costume
Fake pregnancy belly
Fake pregnant stomachs
Sympathy suit
Empathy suit

These are actually nicely manufactured garments. The stuffing is a type of polyfill. One size fits all -- more or less. We find that these are designed mostly for people of average height and up, and of average or lower weight. Women who are significantly overweight may find that it is difficult to look pregnant with these bellies without significant "shifting around" of this added bulk; remember that women who are significantly overweight tend to not really look pregnant even when they are. Shorter people will have to use a safety-pin (or whatever) to shorten the closed strap that goes around the back of the neck, but once adjusted, they'll look great on anyone down to about 5'2". With a little creativity and more pins, they could probably be adapted for physiques down to, perhaps, 4'6. Imagine the fun of strapping up your 12 year old sister and taking her to see relatives you haven't visited for a few months (she could look guilty and remorseful but never offer a word of explanation). We'd like to film that! We suggest that a "tube-top" type garment might be worn over the belly, and then regular clothing over that, as that will smooth out any edges of the garment that might show through a light blouse. Use a loose-fitting tube-top to look farther along, or a tighter one to look otherwise. Or, a heavy sweater will cover it well. And remember that these are designed to be worn fairly low. The idea is to look pregnant, not fat. There's (usually) a difference. We were surprised to see that these look JUST LIKE a pregnant belly when worn. It's really pretty shocking, and made us laugh out loud. We hadn't expected them to look THAT GOOD. But they really do. A few of the guys here wore some of these around town. On a guy, they look like a sloppy beer-belly and we've sold many of these as Santa Costume Bellies. The guys who were fit and trim were shocked by how they were treated by people (especially girls) on the street or in public places when they suddenly looked fat. There was a noticeable lack of respect (profound in some cases). The fat guys just looked fatter, and didn't notice anything different. The women who've tested these out in public were AMAZED by several things: First, guys didn't look at them anymore, and avoided eye contact, as though they were lepers. Want to go out clubbing and not get hit on AT ALL? Just drag this baby out of the closet, strap it on, and you're suddenly invisible to men. Second, women went out of their way to make eye contact, and there was much nodding and glances and smiles of approval from females, as though the wearer was suddenly enrolled in some secret club of preggos. It was downright weird. There's an oddball perk to wearing one of these around: Statistics show that male serial killers virtually never abduct or kill pregnant women. Of course pregnant women are often killed by their bottom-feeding hillbilly boyfriends and husbands, so it's a tradeoff either way. These come packed fairly tightly into their boxes, and so might be wrinkled when they arrive. To relax any wrinkles that develop in shipping, you can iron, on a synthetic setting, and/or use a little handheld garment steamer, if desired. Some of these are made from synthetic fabrics, and some or 100% cotton, depending on which supplier they come from. Sorry, you can't choose -- this is a cheap novelty item, after all, and not a fashion statement. We can't imagine getting more fun or laughs out of ANYTHING that costs about the same as a cheap lunch at MacGurgles. You can barely buy a gallon of gas for this. Every time you feel like getting knocked up, just slip one on and enjoy that "special" feeling. A word of caution though: Don't try to wear one through airport security. It'll show up on the scanner, and security will probably wrestle you to the floor and beat the hell out of you, thinking you're trying to hide a bomb or a case of Hershey Bars. It won't be pretty, flattering, or fun.

Let the games begin.


Fake Bellies Fake Bellies Fake Bellies
Fake Bellies come in just about any color and fabric type,
including reds, greens, blues, cottons and synthetics.
Sorry, fabrics and colors cannot be chosen.

Back Tie, Fake Santa and Pregnant Bellies
MOST bellies ship with an elastic back; Some ship with a tie-back as shown here.

We accept MasterCard, AMEX, Discover, eChecks and VISA, etc.. No goats.

We accept: American Express, Master Card, Visa, Discover

This is a no-return item

------------------------------------------------------------------

 

True-Love Test?

In our days of industrial diving, raising ships, we gave up on using graduates of so-called "commercial diving schools" for various reasons, and just trained our own divers. As part of that training we needed to know which divers would STICK when things went to hell underwater, and which would panic and perhaps take more lives with them.

So, as much as we disliked doing so, we tested every diver to see how they'd react when something "bad" happened on an underwater jobsite. We never, ever tested in stupid ways like turning off their air, but our methods were just as successful in subtler ways. These tests proved invaluable and probably saved lives, not the least of which were the lives of those who were prone to panic and so were removed from environments where panic meant death. We believe in the concept of testing for all sorts of things, but when it comes to love, we're not sure we're "there".

The item on this page and others (Fake Pregnancy tests, Fake DNA tests, Fake Pregnancy Bellies, Fake Ultrasounds and Fake Pregnancy Documents) are sometimes being used in a way that may possibly backfire on the user. We've been aware of this use for some time, and we've been unsure how we felt about it, or how to address it. It is, simply, the use of these fake pregnancy products by women to "test" their boyfriends, husbands, significant others, to see if they truly love them. The idea is that if a significant other gets the news of a surprise pregnancy sprung upon them, they'll either embrace it, or flee, and the option they choose will dictate whether or not they "truly love" the woman perpetrating the ruse. This is very dangerous stuff. In the first place, any initial reaction by the guy may be a knee-jerk reaction. It may not reflect what he really feels. Sure, even if he comes back the next day and begs forgiveness and vows his undying support, you can still argue that he was a scumbag for even having entertained the notion of bolting, and perhaps you'd be right. Or perhaps not.

The human heart is a very complicated thing. None of us has complete control over it; none of us knows FOR SURE what lies in ours. While the use of these products as a test of true love may have "some" benefit in discovering what's really in your mate's heart, the use of these products for that purpose should be discouraged, because the initial reaction may not be the truest reaction. While we do believe in the morality of using "little tests", usually psychological tests, to find out what's in a person's heart, this particular method of testing for true love may be like using a hammer to cave in a skull when a gentle tap on the shoulder would have sufficed.

We urge extreme caution with these products. Think before you buy. Think again before you spring your trap. Be absolutely sure you WANT to know what's in your mate's heart. Sometimes it's better not to know.

You're going somewhere on Turkey-Day and Christmas, Right?
Go Pregnant! You Know You Want to!

These make great Fat Santa Bellies too!
Just wear them higher than for pregnancy
.

$16.95

Quantity:
 

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