Fake Newspapers, Fake Personalized Magazines: The ULTIMATE Gift or Gag. Writers Wanted! Authors Wanted! Poets Wanted!

Here are the glorious winners:

1. When his 38 - caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach, California, would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.

2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting machine and submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.

3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space...understandably, he shot her.

4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayohad escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.

5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.

6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer: $15. (If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed?)

7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape.

8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the purse-snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from."

9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Yipsilanti, Michigan , at 5 a.m, flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.

10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges, saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had.

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Announcements!
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Predict the Future!
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Humiliate Your Neighbors!
Expose Political Corruption!
Affect Local Property Values!
Test Your Significant Other!
Advertise Your Business!
Create Publicity Stunts!
Be Nice to Your Mom!
Express Your Views!
Roast a Colleague!
Honor a Retiree!
Cause Trouble!
Prove a Point!
Impress Guys!
Get Revenge!
Flatter Girls!
Be RIGHT!
Propose!

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Personalized Fake and Joke Newspapers and Personalized Newspapers and Personalized Headlines for Gags and Gifts, Birthdays, Movies and Plays, Advertising, Publicity Stunts, Baby Showers, Wedding Showers, Stag Parties, Corporate Recognition, Awards, Thank You's, Revenge, Make a Point, Birth and Death Announcements, Wedding and Marriage Announcements, Practical Jokes, Cerebral Terrorism, Personalized Birthday Gags, Gifts. Fake Newspapers available in Small (pocket clipping) size, Full single page, Whole newspaper, Giant Poster, and Tabloid (by special request)

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Writers Wanted! Poets and Poetry Wanted!
Short stories, book chapters, editorials, corporate publications

Complete Fake Magazines

Are these just fake magazine covers?
Of course not. This is an entire magazine!

Professionals:
Add a touch of elegance to your office. For law firms, physicians, hair salons; Clients learn about your business and the services you offer, your successes, highlights, promotions and background.

Writers:
Present short stories and book chapters in a way that says class...

Activists:
Make a political statement that speaks loudly and hits hard.

Resumes:
Can you possibly imagine a more memorable resume?

Poets:
Highlight your innermost thoughts and dreams.

Sample cover used when you want to display a portrait (use your own image)
Entire Fake Magazines

What the heck is this?
It's the ultimate form of recognition.

One of dozens of magazine covers to choose from

Browse our covers (below) by clicking the thumbnails.
Artwork, layout and filler pages subject to change without notice

Cover 1 Default (Use your own portrait)	Cover 2 Terrorist Hunting License	Cover 3 Ferret Face-1	Cover 8 The Magician
Cover 4 White Cat	Cover 5 Lake Hand	Cover 12 Adventure (green)	Cover 10 Monorail Stoppee
Cover 11 Adventure (orange)	Cover 9 King of Swords	Cover 7 Plastic Policeman	Cover 6 Human Tiger
Cover 48 Moon Ship	Cover 47 Speedo-Man	Cover 45 Drugs	Cover 43 Religion
Cover 46 Apartment Living	Cover 42 Green jet	Cover 40 Red Devil	Cover 38 Coward in Cave
Cover 36 Sand	Cover 44 Bears	Cover 39 Monorail Wheelchair	Cover 35 Mother Moon
Cover 41 Philosophy-1	Cover 37 Safe to Fly	Cover 30 Road Rage	Cover 33 Horse Face
Cover 32 Ferret Face-3	Cover 31 Modern Marble Art	Cover 29 Terrorist Demands	Cover 27 Ferret Face-2
Cover 28 Bye Bye Osama	Cover 26 New Political Map	Cover 23 I Ben Huntin'	Cover 25 Space Needle Flag
Cover 34 Face	Cover 24 Bad Owl	Cover 21 Your Speed	Cover 19 Orange Fish
Cover 18 Girl in Clouds	Cover 20 Big Ape Man	Cover 17 Yellow Fish	Cover 15 Pink Fish
Cover 16 Multi-Color Fish	Cover 22 Little Ape Man	Cover 13 Monorail Harley	Cover 14 Nuke Al Quaeda

Don't see what you need? Design your own from scratch! (click for info)

Sample of "customer-supplied" covers

Commemorate your Father's life, your husband's career, your child's achievements, an employee's dedication over the span of a career, or your own success.

Personalized Full Color Magazine- Inside

Supply your own cover picture if desired---otherwise choose one of ours. 66 page, full color magazine.
Filler pages subject to change).

Personalized Full Color Magazine

We'll place and arrange your feature story.
It may be about anything at all.

Personalized Magazine Complete with References and Page Numbers

Your material is integrated seamlessly into the magazine, complete with references and page numbers in the contents.

Personalized Magazine with Real Ads

Personalized Magazine with Your Own Articles

The remainder of the magazine is filled with advertisements, and other stories of a varied and eclectic nature.

Personalized Full Color Magazine Article

Change the magazine title to suit. Change the entire cover. Publish a story up to 3500 words with images.

Personalized Magazine Ad

If you're looking for the ultimate roast, gag or honorary product, this is it. Our fake newspapers are cool. But this is the top of the line.

Personalized Magazine- Perfect Gag Gift

Use it for employee retirement, club-member appreciation, or to honor an old friend, co-worker or relative.

Personalized Magazine Ships within 5-7 Days

Your magazine will usually ship within about 5-7 days.

Message: I just received my order today and it turned out awesome! I will recommend you guys to everyone I know. I ordered the fake magazine and I was pleasantly surprised when it came with a a glossy cover and pages for the articles inside. I assumed that it wouldn't be, but it just goes to show that you guys go the extra mile to make it look like the real thing. Thanks again
Bob Hurlbut, artfxscreenprinting.com

Detailed info: What things can I change?

Item No. FM-01
$120 ea.

You may specify "RUSH" shipping for this item, which will cause your order to be shipped via Next Day Air service, but please understand this item may not ship out for several days after we receive the order.

Complete Fake Magazines Fill out the following information and click 'Submit'.

*First Name

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*Cover Selection

*Magazine Name

*Smaller Text Below Mag Name

*Your Name Block (lower right cover)

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*Main Article/Story Title

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